New Year's Eve at 9:58pm

Can you hear the fracture of the water in the womb?

The toll of all good things foretold

That are only swimming until they drown?

The gap between is widening now

And moving like a tremendous machine

But all I have are broken pillars

Now

And jagged stone on which to lean.

They never said that the waters cut

Until each drop of blood

Is spilled in ocean’s misery for

The amusement of countless sharks.

They cut the ocean waves in two

They wait in darkest depths

They are those that you were told to love

And lifelong friends you thought you’d have

But anchors sink the drowning and

This raft was built for one.

I picked pumpkins from a dying field

Where the grass was tall and dead

And I saw these bonds I’d never have

And I watched great pumpkins grow

In the hands of better living things

That knew when frost could turn to snow.

They shared a sliver of their life

With a friend they used to have

And I’ve never felt quite so much at home

Than in the arms of those who were chosen, instead.

And I wish the field wasn’t empty.

I wish those grasses grew.

Past every life I wished to live

And the love I wished I knew.